As a parent, you want to do all you can to protect your children from hurt, from harm, and unseen danger. Often what happens in the pursuit of protection, we fail to prepare them for the real world. The reason why I am a facilitator for love and logic is because love and logic is the ideal parenting tool.
It teaches the parents to love through parenting: to parent with love.
Parenting should prepare children to think critically to synthesize and analyze while problem solving.
Yet, often parents come in to rescue their child from a situation, and to save the day. These limit and stifle the child’s ability to process through a situation, to find the best answer, and to come up with their own solutions.
I heard an example that was very fitting. They first gave the scenario of a child being in a closet and an adult in a room. The closet represents that child’s life and the difference between childhood and adulthood. The scenario went something like this:
I would rather my child be in the closet in the dark and stub his toe or knock a few things off a shelf and we turn on the light and have him realize what he knocked down and bumped. This is the child in his childhood. He makes mistakes and learns from them. Then, the same scenario was given as an adult that’s in a dark room. The light is off. He knocks off a couple of glass vases, breaks a chair, knocks over and damages furniture. We turn on the light and we see how expensive the vase was. We have to analyze how much the broken furniture will cost. This is adulthood. This example has a few changes. The closet now is bigger. It is a room. The items are more descriptive and detailed which indicates the cost value.
As loving parents, we want the lights turned on for our children in that closet, where the damage is minimal; where we can easily help them overcome. We do not want to always rescuing them in the closet of their youth. We must teach them to problem solve. Therefore, when they become adults, they are ready. For in the room of life, we cannot repair, pay or fix all the problems that happen in their adulthood. Yet, we have taught to problem solve.
Protect them but serve them by teaching them how to think critically for themselves. God never forces us to do anything. He teaches by example. He teaches through directions. He teaches through lessons and love. Then, we critically take the steps on this journey of life.